Hey, baby boy, how are you up there?
It's been 7 years and it's not getting any easier. Sometimes I just cry because I miss you so much. I wish I had done things differently, I wish I were stronger. I tried to tell myself and many also told me, that I didn't have a choice but I did, didn't I? I will never know who you'd be like. You are the first and the last love of my life, Miles. There are just days when I just can't take it anymore. I will always, always, always love you and miss you. I wonder if the boy in my dream with the curly black hair and beautiful face that looked so happy running around the playground was you. I wanted to call you but I wasn't sure. When I woke, I realized, it was probably you. God finally heard my prayer, to see you in my dream, how very selfish of me to just ask for that but I am glad that I did. I miss you, I love you, forever and ever.